The Phobias We Don't Mention

Over the past four issues we've looked at what a phobia actually is (3 August), how one gets built (10 August), what hypnosis does about it (17 August), and how to help someone else who's struggling (24 August). I want to finish with the thing that stops most people getting help: embarrassment.

There's a peculiar shame attached to phobias. People will happily tell you about their bad back or their blood pressure, but the needle phobia that has kept them from a blood test for a decade? That stays private. The dread of the dentist that has them managing a cracked tooth with painkillers and hope? Private. The panic that rises on a motorway slip road and quietly shapes every journey they take? Very private indeed.

I understand why. A phobia feels childish to admit, precisely because the sufferer knows the response is out of proportion. But the view from inside an emergency department is rather different: these phobias are extraordinarily common, and they are anything but trivial. Needle phobia keeps people from vaccinations, blood tests, and treatment they genuinely need. Dental phobia turns small problems into large ones. A phobia of medical settings altogether — and yes, that's common too — means conditions get found later than they should. A phobia isn't a quirk. Left alone, it can quietly redirect the course of your health.

And the people carrying these phobias are not weak. They're often the most capable adults you could meet — the sort who handle everything life throws at them — who simply have one alarm set too sensitively. As we've seen this month, that alarm was learned, often in childhood, often without their consent or even their awareness. There's nothing to be ashamed of in that. There's also nothing noble in enduring it forever.

The good news bears repeating: learned alarms can be unlearned. Hypnosis offers a way to do that without flooding, without white-knuckling, and without anyone marching you toward the thing you dread. The work is calm, respectful, and — my clients tell me — considerably more pleasant than living with the phobia.

If a phobia has been quietly running part of your life, this might be the month to stop letting it. You wouldn't be the first, and you certainly wouldn't be the last.

If you would like to talk through any of this, my contact details are below.

Warmly, Denise